The Toddler Survival Guide

Complete Protection from the Whiny Unfed

Nonfiction, Family & Relationships, Parenting, Fatherhood, Family Relationships, Motherhood, Entertainment, Humour & Comedy, General Humour
Cover of the book The Toddler Survival Guide by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr, Voyageur Press
View on Amazon View on AbeBooks View on Kobo View on B.Depository View on eBay View on Walmart
Author: Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr ISBN: 9780760359709
Publisher: Voyageur Press Publication: August 1, 2017
Imprint: Language: English
Author: Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
ISBN: 9780760359709
Publisher: Voyageur Press
Publication: August 1, 2017
Imprint:
Language: English

Get the baby gates, lock the cupboards, and load up Elmo's Song, toddlers are on the loose. The Toddler Survival Guide is here to get you to the other side.

Toddlers and zombies** both communicate mainly through groans, clumsily trail after you everywhere you go (especially into the bathroom in the toddler's case), and--upon entering your life--leave you frazzled, on edge, and deeply sleep deprived.

The Toddler Survival Guide is a hilarious parody of Max Brooks's The Zombie Survival Guide (and survival guides in general) that will leave parents laughing out loud even as it provides practical advice on how they can make it to the other side of toddlerhood intact. Written by parents who have studied toddlers up-close in their natural habitat, the book will cover survival skills including how you can outfit your home to outlast a toddler occupation (baby gate, cabinet locks, wine), how you can subdue an angry toddler ("Elmo's Song," mac and cheese, smartphone) and even how you can safely venture out in public together without your toddler--or you--bursting into tears.

Chapters include: Preparing the Home for a Toddler Invasion, Communicating with Your Toddler, Feeding a Toddler, Socializing Your Toddler, Grooming Your Toddler, Venturing into Public with a Toddler, Documenting Your Life with a Toddler, Vacationing with a Toddler, Toddler Entertainment and Birthdays, Surviving Bedtime and Potty Training, Technology and the Toddler, and Parental Self-Preservation.

View on Amazon View on AbeBooks View on Kobo View on B.Depository View on eBay View on Walmart

Get the baby gates, lock the cupboards, and load up Elmo's Song, toddlers are on the loose. The Toddler Survival Guide is here to get you to the other side.

Toddlers and zombies** both communicate mainly through groans, clumsily trail after you everywhere you go (especially into the bathroom in the toddler's case), and--upon entering your life--leave you frazzled, on edge, and deeply sleep deprived.

The Toddler Survival Guide is a hilarious parody of Max Brooks's The Zombie Survival Guide (and survival guides in general) that will leave parents laughing out loud even as it provides practical advice on how they can make it to the other side of toddlerhood intact. Written by parents who have studied toddlers up-close in their natural habitat, the book will cover survival skills including how you can outfit your home to outlast a toddler occupation (baby gate, cabinet locks, wine), how you can subdue an angry toddler ("Elmo's Song," mac and cheese, smartphone) and even how you can safely venture out in public together without your toddler--or you--bursting into tears.

Chapters include: Preparing the Home for a Toddler Invasion, Communicating with Your Toddler, Feeding a Toddler, Socializing Your Toddler, Grooming Your Toddler, Venturing into Public with a Toddler, Documenting Your Life with a Toddler, Vacationing with a Toddler, Toddler Entertainment and Birthdays, Surviving Bedtime and Potty Training, Technology and the Toddler, and Parental Self-Preservation.

More books from Voyageur Press

Cover of the book Hidden Warships by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book Backroads of the California Coast by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book X-15 by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book Target: Rabaul by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book Homebrew All-Stars by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book Knitting Yarns and Spinning Tales by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book How to Raise Pigs by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book 101 Chicken Keeping Hacks from Fresh Eggs Daily by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book Bread by Mother Earth News by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book Speed Brewing by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book The Backyard Field Guide to Chickens by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book Bourbon by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book The Minnesota Homegrown Cookbook by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book Merrill's Marauders by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
Cover of the book USS Missouri at War by Mike Spohr, Heather Spohr
We use our own "cookies" and third party cookies to improve services and to see statistical information. By using this website, you agree to our Privacy Policy