The Art of the Steal

The Art of the Steal is a work of fiction that is built upon a primarily factual foundation. It is written from the point of view of Aimon Niddy Ott — Trump’s Id as imagined by Dr. Cynthia Zaitz. Ott glorifies his every disastrous thought, choice, and action with exaggerated expressions of braggadocio and victimhood, with the occasional interjected opinions and corrections from Zaitz. The Art of the Steal covers Ott’s strong influence by prosperity pastor Norman Vincent Peale, his daily schedule, his blatant racism, his constant criticism of the media, many of his foreign and domestic deals, his numerous relationships with shady characters, his admiration for Vladimir Putin, and more. There are cartoons throughout that highlight Ott’s insatiable greed, unapologetic self-delusion, constant need for approval, and incredible narcissism. There are nine chapters in Art of the Steal -- here are descriptions of four of them: In the chapter entitled “Stealing a Peak at My Week,” Ott discusses his grooming habits and daily regimen – complete with professional evaluations of his facial expressions and dietary habits. In “Stealing!” Ott brags about many of his international dealings, his fondness for dictators, and his habit of partnering with various mafia groups and banks that allegedly launder Russian money. In “The Elements of the Steal,” Ott explains how he makes sure to have plenty of scapegoats on hand so that when his ‘steals’ fail – as they often do – he always has some underling available to face the consequences. In this chapter he also discusses his great relationships with women. In “How to Get Media Coverage,” Ott explains how he got great media coverage for his pardon of Joe Arpaio during the immediate aftermath of Hurricane Sandy, the great job he did passing out paper towels in Puerto Rico, and the terrible fake news coverage he got about the great job that he did personally helping with rescue efforts in Texas and the country of Puerto Rico. He also demonstrates his unabashed racism in his continuous criticism of Colin Kaepernick and the ‘Take a Knee’ movement. Also included in Art of the Steal are several references to how Ott was influenced by Norman Vincent Peale’s ‘prosperity principles,’ and a discussion about how Peale may have instigated Ott’s obsession with doubling down on his many lies in order to convince himself they are true. Although taking an imaginary trip through AIMON Ott’s psyche does engender some empathy for the man, in general the book is overwhelmingly irreverent and disrespectful -- which seems appropriate in terms of the outrageously irreverent and disrespectful behavior we have seen from the 45th President of the United States.