Love Dreams—Mi Dulcevida Loca

A Diary of Secrets, Lust and Love

At a point in my life when I least expected it, I am having a sex affair that has completely electrified my world. He is much younger. I have had many others, so I thought I knew a lot about romance. But I am lost in his arms, caught in a world of seething emotions and of sometimes ferocious but always deliriously torrid sex. Somehow, I want to submit to him. Its a powerful elixir of passionan exquisite mix of pleasure and pain in a whirlpool of forbidden ecstasy. Its another dimension, of delights and of danger, and I am willingly trapped in it. I do not want to find the way out. Hes everything I want: passionate, possessive, hot, sweet, caring, romantic, demanding, and inventive. Hes a gorgeous man who drives me to utter distraction, yet he also treats me like a delicate flower. I admit I am his love slave. Its wanting, waiting, crying; then laughing, playing, teasing; then worrying and hopingjust tossed wildly and wonderfully on a turbulent sea of love. He says he doesnt care how old I am. He said that hes addicted to me. Being in love with someone who loves you too is fantastic! Day and night, he is in my heart. He says he loves me forever, and I adore him. But if he stops loving me, its all over. There is no way to make love stay. Love does not ever follow anyones wishes. I want it more than anything, and yet I am so scared of it. But its all a secret! Im terrified of the risk of discovery. I never wanted anything as deep or intense as what has happened with him. We are in a fragile fantasy world. He is leading me on a path of unknown places, and I want to go wherever he will take me. If he offers his hand, I take it. Never have I had such a sweet dream as him. I am in paradise in his arms, and I am in hell when I feel that we will separate. I will always be in love with him, yet I know fully well it may end anytime. And this is my life.