How Julian and Nigel Turned Each Other Gay (Inadvertently), or So They Both Claim

Julian Morris was not quite happy about his first year at St. Widifroth's-on-Quinapoxet, the school for the blameworthy rich. He had two obnoxious roommates, whom he had grown somewhat used to; semi-interesting classes, or rather classes he hadn't yet managed to fall asleep in; and two parents who apparently couldn't read a school prospectus properly. Why else would they have sent him to St. Widifroth's? Well, it might have had something to do with one D too many on his last report card. But who cared about igneous rocks and isosceles triangles anyway? Then he met Nigel Higginson, who turned him gay, only to have Julian return the favor.