Till Death Do Us Fart

Fiction & Literature, Humorous
Cover of the book Till Death Do Us Fart by Donald Rump, Donald Rump
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Author: Donald Rump ISBN: 9781624545184
Publisher: Donald Rump Publication: May 18, 2014
Imprint: Language: English
Author: Donald Rump
ISBN: 9781624545184
Publisher: Donald Rump
Publication: May 18, 2014
Imprint:
Language: English

Helen Hubbard's fears have finally been confirmed. During brunch one morning in her favorite restaurant, her husband Gary confesses to cheating on her, and is ready to leave at a moment's notice. When she pries deeper into the matter, she discovers more about his mysterious lover Muffy than she cares to know. “So you’re leaving me for a fart???” Helen exclaimed.

For mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 2,500 words.

EXCERPT FROM TILL DEATH DO US FART

“I’ve met someone.” Gary Hubbard lowered his eyes and stared at the floor.

“And?” said his wife Helen, spreading cream cheese over her cinnamon raisin bagel.

“And…I’m sorry…I wanted to tell you sooner…” He kept his eyes anchored to the floor.

“Tell me what?”

“It’s just that…I’m sorry, dear, but we can’t be together anymore. I found her, my one and only true love!” Gary confessed.

Helen did not flinch or smash a plate over Gary’s thick skull. She sat at the table, calm and collected, and took a sip of coffee. “How long has it been going on?” She set her cup back on the saucer.

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Helen Hubbard's fears have finally been confirmed. During brunch one morning in her favorite restaurant, her husband Gary confesses to cheating on her, and is ready to leave at a moment's notice. When she pries deeper into the matter, she discovers more about his mysterious lover Muffy than she cares to know. “So you’re leaving me for a fart???” Helen exclaimed.

For mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 2,500 words.

EXCERPT FROM TILL DEATH DO US FART

“I’ve met someone.” Gary Hubbard lowered his eyes and stared at the floor.

“And?” said his wife Helen, spreading cream cheese over her cinnamon raisin bagel.

“And…I’m sorry…I wanted to tell you sooner…” He kept his eyes anchored to the floor.

“Tell me what?”

“It’s just that…I’m sorry, dear, but we can’t be together anymore. I found her, my one and only true love!” Gary confessed.

Helen did not flinch or smash a plate over Gary’s thick skull. She sat at the table, calm and collected, and took a sip of coffee. “How long has it been going on?” She set her cup back on the saucer.

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