The Business of Love

Prescriptions to Finding and Keeping a good Man I started out talking about business and wanting to do business book cdʼs and dvdʼs. Upon the release of my first book, Dr. Heavenly Business Prescriptions, I went out to celebrate with some friends who revealed to me that they had their business affairs in order. What they needed was a man to share their successes with. It made me think that more women need tips on how to have a relationship or how to get a man and keep him. On this particular evening, we were at a restaurant with two other couples. One of the ladies was an executive at a Fortune 500 company and was making well over six figures annually. Her boyfriend was unemployed and had previously worked in the Real Estate industry but had become a casualty of the housing market bubble. He was also 10 years younger than her. As the night went on, we noticed that he was totally disrespecting her. He called her a bitch and told her to just eat her food. This was a successful beautiful black woman that was allowing this nothing ass (excuse my language) man or someone who was irrelevant in my eyes to abuse her verbally. After pulling her aside during a trip to the restroom, I asked "Why are you with him?" Her response blew me away and was the catalyst to me knowing that I needed to write this book. “Heavenly, Iʼm with this guy because when Iʼm not with him I canʼt concentrate on my business. I love him." She explained. As I stood there in amazement, I asked, "What is love if heʼs going to treat you this way?” She replied, “Itʼs okay, Heavenly, that he called me a bitch.” I told her itʼs not okay to let a man disrespect her. With that in mind, I felt that women needed a book that spoke directly on how to get a good man and keep him. Some men are not worth having. Many women are successful in business or their careers, but they need help with building strong, sustainable relationships. Looking into my own relationship, what it took to actually get my husband to see that I was the one was pretty basic. I was just myself. However, that was not the answer my girlfriends wanted to hear. Most of them felt that there had to be more to it and maybe they’re right. I was curious myself because it seemed to have become the consensus among many single women whom I have come in contact with. On the other side, I have also had multiple conversations with women who have gone through divorce and their challenge was not finding a man, but understanding how to keep him once they do snag him. The divorce rate among Americans was often discussed and the 50% rate that many claim had been disputed. Sure, it may not be that 50% of marriages end in divorce, but I would venture to say that it is a substantial number. This statement stuck with me as I had been hearing it more recently. These women I encountered were having issues with finding the "right" man. What I have realized is that finding him and keeping him is definitely a job, but it must be a job you love to work if you are going to make it a success. This type of conversation caused a light bulb to go off in my head. What could I do to help not only the women in my circle but also the women across the country who were dealing with the same or similar issues? The reality is that it is not easy for women to find a good man. And to be honest, it is not easy for a man to find a good woman. Nonetheless, it is well worth the effort when you do find him or her. I keep hearing the phrase, "How to Find and Keep a Man" and so, I decided to dig deeper into this. I decided to have a session with a few friends to discuss these issues and lend my knowledge and experiences. I informed them all that this would not be a bitch or a bashing session, but rather, an outlet to provide solutions for women who are battling relationship challenges. It would be about six strong females coming together to learn from each other’s experiences. The goal to seek the oh so elusive "relationship satisfaction" that