Why Can't You Shut Up?

How We Ruin Relationships--How Not To

Nonfiction, Health & Well Being, Psychology, Interpersonal Relations, Self Help, Self Improvement
Cover of the book Why Can't You Shut Up? by Anthony Wolf, Random House Publishing Group
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Author: Anthony Wolf ISBN: 9780307417763
Publisher: Random House Publishing Group Publication: December 18, 2007
Imprint: Ballantine Books Language: English
Author: Anthony Wolf
ISBN: 9780307417763
Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
Publication: December 18, 2007
Imprint: Ballantine Books
Language: English

“You forgot to buy milk!”
“You never said anything about milk.”
“Yes, I definitely did. You never listen.”
“I do too listen. You never said milk.”
“No, I did say milk. You just don’t listen.”

We’ve all been in situations like this one–when a loved one unintentionally provokes a confrontation. What do we do? We stand our ground, push our point, and underscore our reasons. We do it because we know we’re right. What is it, deep inside our being, that refuses to budge, to give in, or to shut up before we’re embroiled in a fight we don’t want? Meet your baby self. According to Dr. Anthony Wolf, this childish personality comes out at home, at work, and in social settings–with spouses, significant others, colleagues, and even friends. The baby self doesn’t know when to back down, it doesn’t compromise, and it can lead you to make rash and, usually, wrong decisions.

In this humorous, helpful, and eye-opening guide, you’ll learn how to deal with your baby self when it wreaks havoc on your life. Dr. Wolf provides alternate ways of responding to others when your baby self is ready to scream: It’s not fair! It’s not my fault! You are wrong! He offers ways to avoid the traps that sabotage all relationships, helps us recognize the false reasons we trick ourselves into thinking we are right, and teaches us how to let our mature side do the talking. With scores of examples of how innocent day-to-day conversations can erupt into conflagrations, Dr. Wolf shows you how to disengage fast and easily. The result? Peace, positive dialogue, and happier relationships all around–even if deep down you knowyou are right!

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“You forgot to buy milk!”
“You never said anything about milk.”
“Yes, I definitely did. You never listen.”
“I do too listen. You never said milk.”
“No, I did say milk. You just don’t listen.”

We’ve all been in situations like this one–when a loved one unintentionally provokes a confrontation. What do we do? We stand our ground, push our point, and underscore our reasons. We do it because we know we’re right. What is it, deep inside our being, that refuses to budge, to give in, or to shut up before we’re embroiled in a fight we don’t want? Meet your baby self. According to Dr. Anthony Wolf, this childish personality comes out at home, at work, and in social settings–with spouses, significant others, colleagues, and even friends. The baby self doesn’t know when to back down, it doesn’t compromise, and it can lead you to make rash and, usually, wrong decisions.

In this humorous, helpful, and eye-opening guide, you’ll learn how to deal with your baby self when it wreaks havoc on your life. Dr. Wolf provides alternate ways of responding to others when your baby self is ready to scream: It’s not fair! It’s not my fault! You are wrong! He offers ways to avoid the traps that sabotage all relationships, helps us recognize the false reasons we trick ourselves into thinking we are right, and teaches us how to let our mature side do the talking. With scores of examples of how innocent day-to-day conversations can erupt into conflagrations, Dr. Wolf shows you how to disengage fast and easily. The result? Peace, positive dialogue, and happier relationships all around–even if deep down you knowyou are right!

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