Werewolves Don't Eat Brunch / Vampires Suck Bundle
Nonfiction, Entertainment, Film, Guides & Reviews, Performing Arts, History & Criticism
| Author: | Mr. Satanism | ISBN: | 9781386941224 |
| Publisher: | Inept Concepts | Publication: | May 15, 2017 |
| Imprint: | Language: | English |
| Author: | Mr. Satanism |
| ISBN: | 9781386941224 |
| Publisher: | Inept Concepts |
| Publication: | May 15, 2017 |
| Imprint: | |
| Language: | English |
Two classic movie monsters, together again!
Remember when vampires were scary? Yeah, us neither. Between your Twilight and your Vampire: The Masquerade vampires have become the biggest tools in monsterdom, never mind the fact that they weren't exactly firing on all their horror cylinders to begin with. Honestly, have you seen the original Dracula? It has armadillos in it! Fortunately, misanthropic film critic Mr. Satanism is here to put all these bloodsucking turds (try getting THAT image out of your head) to rest, from the not-quite classics to the modern parade of non-vampires that drink Perrier instead of blood and sparkle when you spank them. Because let's face it, new or old, Hollywood blockbusters or direct-to-streaming also-rans, vampire movies suck.
Plus:
Rage-fueled supervillain-cum-movie critic Mr. Satanism is back, with an entire book dedicated exclusively to werewolf movies. Why? Because he hates himself, apparently. See, despite being one of monsterdom's elite trifecta (alongside Dracula and the Frankenstein Monster) the werewolf hasn't been served too well by Hollywood, or anyone else, for that matter. (The only original Big G Monster Cereal to be permanently discontinued? Fruit Brute, the werewolf-themed one.) Seriously, name three truly great werewolf movies. Congratulations, you've just named the only three truly great werewolf movies. There's plenty of crappy ones, though, and that's where this book comes in. Just don't read it by the light of the full moon, because werewolves may not eat brunch, but they're always up for a midnight snack. (In case you're not clear on this, that's you. You're the midnight snack.)
Two classic movie monsters, together again!
Remember when vampires were scary? Yeah, us neither. Between your Twilight and your Vampire: The Masquerade vampires have become the biggest tools in monsterdom, never mind the fact that they weren't exactly firing on all their horror cylinders to begin with. Honestly, have you seen the original Dracula? It has armadillos in it! Fortunately, misanthropic film critic Mr. Satanism is here to put all these bloodsucking turds (try getting THAT image out of your head) to rest, from the not-quite classics to the modern parade of non-vampires that drink Perrier instead of blood and sparkle when you spank them. Because let's face it, new or old, Hollywood blockbusters or direct-to-streaming also-rans, vampire movies suck.
Plus:
Rage-fueled supervillain-cum-movie critic Mr. Satanism is back, with an entire book dedicated exclusively to werewolf movies. Why? Because he hates himself, apparently. See, despite being one of monsterdom's elite trifecta (alongside Dracula and the Frankenstein Monster) the werewolf hasn't been served too well by Hollywood, or anyone else, for that matter. (The only original Big G Monster Cereal to be permanently discontinued? Fruit Brute, the werewolf-themed one.) Seriously, name three truly great werewolf movies. Congratulations, you've just named the only three truly great werewolf movies. There's plenty of crappy ones, though, and that's where this book comes in. Just don't read it by the light of the full moon, because werewolves may not eat brunch, but they're always up for a midnight snack. (In case you're not clear on this, that's you. You're the midnight snack.)
