Wars of Roses

Nonfiction, Health & Well Being, Health, Romance, Erotica
Cover of the book Wars of Roses by Rose Maru, Rose Maru
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Author: Rose Maru ISBN: 9781370558261
Publisher: Rose Maru Publication: December 14, 2016
Imprint: Smashwords Language: English
Author: Rose Maru
ISBN: 9781370558261
Publisher: Rose Maru
Publication: December 14, 2016
Imprint: Smashwords
Language: English

Wouldn't you know it? Just when I thought I had things completely unfigured out, turns out, I might've been onto something (which could be a good reason I'd been forgetting to get onto his something, lately). "I made a mistake once... I thought I was wrong." Low and behold, dammit all, if writing wasn't doing at least a little bit for me. If nothing else, it was a needed outlet. For what, the hell if I know - but my life stumbled more than usual when I hung up my typewriter (Puh-lease! Just go with it, okay? "Word processor" - is that better? Rotten kids these days...) earlier this past year. I can't believe it - I missed getting wet, ridden until the spurs fell off, and all those other fictitious things I wasn't in real life (at least not routinely - which isn't to say I had hung up my spurs completely, but unused long enough to get a bit rusty).
Puns 'n Roses, originally carrying the more serious title, "War of Rose's" (and for good reason), is my foray back into the world of the living and the alternative dimensional living that's my alter ego (who gets a lot more action than I do) as we work our way through one confession after another, until we reach a happy ending (and it didn't even cost extra! (If you don't get it, write me, I'll explain it).) - at least after we make Randy pay for pissing us off. Trust me, you don't want to make Rosie go Ape-Bitch on your ass. (Small update: two stories added when this book became "Wars of Roses" and I decided to slide backwards... yet again.)
Which means this collection is a really wide range, covering everything from how I dealt with a tax audit to the challenges of practicing to be the attraction at a sex party. Along the way I hit some more memories from growing up, more work in front of the camera, and lots more work for my playful little kitty down there. As usual, there's even educational elements, like learning about boobometers and swimming pools, and a brief research paper on "Humpable - Not Humpable" items you might find around the house, yard, and ranch.
The actual stories in this treatise include:
Introduction
Extended Introduction
- Fiction -
Road Master (growing up a country girl can be challenging when it comes to learning to deal with certain urges and desires)
Taxman (learn how I dealt with a tax auditor questioning my itemized write-offs and double-entry accounting methods)
Curiosity (the slightly fictional path to my writing erotica again... and dusting off little used 'toys')
You Put 'em Back (a poor choice of words, a city limit sign, and nowhere to hide)
Party Favor (oh, tell me I didn't start this, because my name and 'sex party' should not be in the same sentence, let alone me needing to prepare for one)
Pissed On the Road
Pool Party (dammit, first it was birthdays and now pool parties - I'm getting put on more people's list of who not to invite because "She seems to be inappropriate enhanced")
Pissed On the Set
Word Association Gone Wong
- Shades of Gray -
She Sells Her Hell by the Sea Shore
She Shed, Gym (dammit - I am not putting this in non-fiction! A habit of questionable appropriateness for the gym)
- Non-Fiction -
Question & Answer Session 4
Slingshot (more small town life at its best)
A Picture of Me - Without Him (emotional voyeurism at its worst... "Wars" it is.)
Humpable / Not Humpable (gosh, I wonder what this could be about? More important, WTF: it's in non-fiction? Who talked me into *that*?)
Conclusion
Plus, as always, that wonderfully painful (but hopefully enlightening) "Truth and Consequences" section to cover every story and uncover yet more of me - as if there's anything left you haven't seen or don't already know about me.
As per Rose series books, bonus section samples of complete select stories from my previous published works.
Pony up and ride along with me on yet another erotic adventure through embarrassment, real-life mommy porn, and sexual awakening and rediscovered repressions. Therapist not included.

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Wouldn't you know it? Just when I thought I had things completely unfigured out, turns out, I might've been onto something (which could be a good reason I'd been forgetting to get onto his something, lately). "I made a mistake once... I thought I was wrong." Low and behold, dammit all, if writing wasn't doing at least a little bit for me. If nothing else, it was a needed outlet. For what, the hell if I know - but my life stumbled more than usual when I hung up my typewriter (Puh-lease! Just go with it, okay? "Word processor" - is that better? Rotten kids these days...) earlier this past year. I can't believe it - I missed getting wet, ridden until the spurs fell off, and all those other fictitious things I wasn't in real life (at least not routinely - which isn't to say I had hung up my spurs completely, but unused long enough to get a bit rusty).
Puns 'n Roses, originally carrying the more serious title, "War of Rose's" (and for good reason), is my foray back into the world of the living and the alternative dimensional living that's my alter ego (who gets a lot more action than I do) as we work our way through one confession after another, until we reach a happy ending (and it didn't even cost extra! (If you don't get it, write me, I'll explain it).) - at least after we make Randy pay for pissing us off. Trust me, you don't want to make Rosie go Ape-Bitch on your ass. (Small update: two stories added when this book became "Wars of Roses" and I decided to slide backwards... yet again.)
Which means this collection is a really wide range, covering everything from how I dealt with a tax audit to the challenges of practicing to be the attraction at a sex party. Along the way I hit some more memories from growing up, more work in front of the camera, and lots more work for my playful little kitty down there. As usual, there's even educational elements, like learning about boobometers and swimming pools, and a brief research paper on "Humpable - Not Humpable" items you might find around the house, yard, and ranch.
The actual stories in this treatise include:
Introduction
Extended Introduction
- Fiction -
Road Master (growing up a country girl can be challenging when it comes to learning to deal with certain urges and desires)
Taxman (learn how I dealt with a tax auditor questioning my itemized write-offs and double-entry accounting methods)
Curiosity (the slightly fictional path to my writing erotica again... and dusting off little used 'toys')
You Put 'em Back (a poor choice of words, a city limit sign, and nowhere to hide)
Party Favor (oh, tell me I didn't start this, because my name and 'sex party' should not be in the same sentence, let alone me needing to prepare for one)
Pissed On the Road
Pool Party (dammit, first it was birthdays and now pool parties - I'm getting put on more people's list of who not to invite because "She seems to be inappropriate enhanced")
Pissed On the Set
Word Association Gone Wong
- Shades of Gray -
She Sells Her Hell by the Sea Shore
She Shed, Gym (dammit - I am not putting this in non-fiction! A habit of questionable appropriateness for the gym)
- Non-Fiction -
Question & Answer Session 4
Slingshot (more small town life at its best)
A Picture of Me - Without Him (emotional voyeurism at its worst... "Wars" it is.)
Humpable / Not Humpable (gosh, I wonder what this could be about? More important, WTF: it's in non-fiction? Who talked me into *that*?)
Conclusion
Plus, as always, that wonderfully painful (but hopefully enlightening) "Truth and Consequences" section to cover every story and uncover yet more of me - as if there's anything left you haven't seen or don't already know about me.
As per Rose series books, bonus section samples of complete select stories from my previous published works.
Pony up and ride along with me on yet another erotic adventure through embarrassment, real-life mommy porn, and sexual awakening and rediscovered repressions. Therapist not included.

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