Obituary for a Bad Man

Obituaries and funerals are always the same. It does not matter if the deceased was a great man or a monster; those eulogizing him will proclaim the same thing: that he was an awesome guy, a loving father, and a valued member of the community. Few people question any of it, especially surviving relatives. No matter how heinous he was, he'll get a "get out of jail free card" at the end.

My father, Louis J. Helbert, Jr., was a rotten, despicable man. He abandoned his family and his terminally ill wife when she needed him most. He then repeatedly sued her and his children into poverty. He had multiple affairs on my mother and the two wives following, squandered his children's inheritance, and was a virulent bigot and racist. He beat his children, and used to, for laughs, give his pre-schooler son booze until he passed out. That son later died of acute alcoholism. To say anything kind of this monster in an obituary or at his funeral would be an outrage and a putrid act of cowardice, not to mention an additional crime against all those he harmed.

This obituary seeks to set the record straight about this man before the pleasant lies are published.