Jessica

The Autobiography of an Infant

A few minutes before, Jessica had said, "I now know all that I feel and why." Now, in a decidedly different tone of voice, she said, "But I still don't know me or even if a me really exists....I'm trying to find her, and I can't!" She dug her fingertips into my back. "I can't find my me. She's been lost! Are you sure she's there?" "Sure." My reassurance had no effect. The secret terror that had haunted her before she had had words for it, came gushing out. "I'm not even sure she exists anymore, or if she didn't just die, or if she didn't just leave somewhere. Will you help me find her? I can't. I can't find her anywhere. She's gone! Ow! No! No! My 'me' never had a chance. As soon as I got my hands on it, somebody ripped it away from me!"