An Open Book 3

My Story

DIARY OF A ROLLING STONE

and HOW I HAVE JUST THROWN A DOUBLE SIX TO START A NEW
STABLE LIFE.

I don't know why "the hell" (oops, er sorry) I am writing this story of my life; because probably
nobody will believe it, but my friends (who are a motley collection of out of the ordinary crazy individuals, as opposed to my dear wife's rather "straight-laced"
friends) have suggested that this account of my life could be a “best seller” (hyperbole-big word, eh).
We shall see! Dream on, “sonny boy"!

I am writing these first words on a Jumbo jet bound for New Zealand... and who knows what! I am a 39 year old male, who has been working in Cape Town as the Life Manager of a dynamic insurance brokerage, marking time to join my wife, M and twin sons, G and S in New Zealand. They have gone there 6 weeks ago on our second immigration to NZ (4th actually in 4 years...so we have had plenty of practice runs). We are going there for a dull stable life of bottling jams, pickling bums, er sorry buns and especially picking noses and endless cups of tea (as my dear mother says, all Kiwis do that - pick their noses, except for “straight” Round Tablers and Rotarians, who don’t do it at functions!). So I guess I’ll have to learn how to pick my nose to be accepted In “Godzone”*. Please excuse my dear “crazy” wife (must have got the “bug” from your author, but indeed she has a heart of gold. RIP our chaotic crazy existence so far. * little joke interlude Question: “Do you pick your nose?” Answer: “If I were you, I would have picked a better one!” * I think that I have always been a bit different to the "normal run of the mill sort of person"; so let's start at the beginning and maybe we can understand why my life has been waylaid (and I have been laid) by many tributaries off the beaten track. I am now starting this account of my life on an aeroplane heading for the other side of the planet: the idyllic South Pacific islands of New Zealand to rejoin my family there and a new future. What will happen to me and my family there? We shall see... October 1989...high up in the sky * As my dear mother once said, “I’ve been riding the rapids of life in all my years”; so now its rather nice to be becalmed here in these calm waters. Yes, here in the haven and at the same time, the harbour of “Sleepy Hollow”, we are sheltered from the storms of life. And this is the reason why I have been able to write so prolifically. .

* Though I don’t know why the story of my “insignificant little life” should be so interesting as to have written a book about it. However, my dear wife, M said that it may be fascinating and inspirational to others! She also said it might HELP other people having a battle in the “game of life”. I really don’t know about all that. I think I’m really quite an “ordinary bloke”. Anyway, whatever the “boss” says, gets done. So here is my “little” story…
C started 1995

PROLOGUE

I came across this fine bit of writing, which I could closely relate to in those dark days. Diana’s words describe my feelings better than I could myself… so here they are…

“People speak glibly about life changing moments. Some truly qualify. You propose marriage and are accepted. You hear, ‘You’re hired’ or ‘You’re fired’ and your future shifts instantly. The doctor says ‘malignant’ (or something else life-changing) and everything is different. But anyone who has ever lived through it will tell you: It is profoundly shattering to learn, in one instant, that everything you thought was true about a loved one (my words: or perhaps your own life) is actually a lie. (Your entire world is turned upside down – what you thought about yourself, and what gave meaning to your life). The world rocks on its axis; when it is finally steady again, you are in a strange place that resembles, but is totally unlike the place you were in just a moment earlier.”

Diana Henriques in ‘Wizard of Lies

And that’s exactly as I felt as I tried to absorb the words of the spe