AMERICAN ESSAYS God Bless the USA!

No "real American" should read this book. But that's okay, since real Americans, like Sarah Palin for example, can't read anyway. And this book is banned in Texas. Which is kind of redundant considering the last sentence.

This book is a compilation of satirical and comedic essays and short pieces intended to entertain, amuse, enlighten, inspire, outrage, inform, instruct, and any other descriptive words I can use to get you to take a look at it and spend a measly two-dollars-and-ninety-nine-cents, which is less than a cup of coffee, for Christ's sake. And no one spent hours writing that coffee, although a guy probably named Pedro or Pepe got a backache picking it. This book is a virtual smorgasbord of all things American, complete with comedy, satire, sarcasm, foul language, and hard-hitting political and social commentary. If you do not know what smorgasbord means, do not attempt to read this book. If you know what smorgasbord means, please tell me. If it's French, don't tell me, I don't want to know; real Americans don't like anything French.